Uncle What-Is-It is Coming to Visit!!
by, Michael Willhoite
I liked this book primarily because it illustrates the importance of open communication between parents and their children. As I read several different "controversial" books for this assignment, it occurs to me that as adults, we often create controversy and inadvertently fuel feelings of uneasiness by our own responses to "controversial" topics. Children are typically much more comfortable with a matter of fact discussion, and I think adults tend to make these issues more complicated. When the children in this story ask what "gay" means, "mom's eyes popped wide open, as black smoke started billowing out of the kitchen." She dashed to the stove, and never answered the kid's question. I think this scenario probably occurs many times in families in our society. Unfortunately, when this happens, kids go out into the world, and get their information from other uninformed children or information based upon stereotypes and misunderstandings.
At the end of this story, when Uncle Brett explains to the children "gay men are just guys who fall in love with each other instead of women," the children clearly understand that this isn't such a big deal. I think the last page of this book provides good information for parents who might struggle to know how to talk about sexuality issues.
I struggled the most with the use of the words "fag" and "queer" in this book. On the one hand, including these words could help parents to engage their children in a meaningful conversation about the harmful effects of using hateful language and name-calling. However, I must admit I squirm when I read these words in a children's book.
Like many of the controversial books I read, I think the manner in which this book is presented to children will make all the difference.
I read this book too and felt very similarly to you, Suellen. I think one of the biggest issues regarding the topic of homosexuality (or sex) with kids and parents is the fact that parents make it so awkward. They try to beat-around-the-bush or avoid answering their kids truthfully so kids certainly end up informing (or MISinforming) each other. Parents who don't ask their kids what "fag" or "queer" mean and who don't talk about why they shouldn't use those hurtful nicknames contribute to the high usage of those names in schools. I also cringed when I read those nicknames, but those are words that are used in schools heavily. That's reality. If I were to read this book to my classroom, some kids may question those words, ask what they mean or even giggle when they hear them and that would provide an incredible teaching moment where you could explain what those words mean and why they're inappropriate.
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